Thanksgiving 2004, Still good today

Thanksgiving
Today, as I helped some of those I minister to, prepare for Thanksgiving by taking them to the grocer and to a church that handed out food, I was asked several times what we were planning to do for that day. Now we have plans but it got me to thinking about what I have to be thankful for. There is so much that I don’t think this computer has enough room to hold it all but let me try to tell of some of it.
I am thankful for the eyes I have that allow me to see without the blinders I carried for most of my life. These blinders are the same ones we all have, they are the filters of our entire life’s experience that shade how we see the world. They are the prejudices and judgments we place on all, based on how we were told it should be. I lost these blinders when I lost my memory. Not having these blinders is a curse as well as a blessing for I now see what I used to choose not to, what I used to pretend was not there. I would just blindly walk by and refuse to see what was in front of me or I would categorize and dismiss something by casting my judgment, thus justifying my inaction in the matter.
Now I walk this world as an observer, watching those who live in different realms that are not familiar. Many of those I help are living fractured and in some cases shattered lives. Now it is true that some of these lives are the results of poor decision making and lifestyle choices but that does not negate their humanity or the pain, depression, and sorrow they feel. I cannot just say they asked for it and walk away for while there are always consequences for the paths we choose there is always the possibility of helping others choose a better path. Actually I don’t see it as just a possibility but a responsibility. Because I have personally walked down so many wrong paths and know where they lead I am compelled to at least point them in the right direction. As the Bible says “There is a way which seems right to a man but the end of that way is death”.
Let me tell you of some of the lives I have the privilege of touching and being touched by.
Wayne is a Vietnam era veteran whom I met at a homeless shelter. He has Multiple Sclerosis and it was diagnosed 10 years ago. Like many he tried to ignore it and tough it out, determined not to be a burden on others and convinced that the mark of a man is to take care of your own problems. Try as he might it still caught up with him and despite years as a skilled union welder and a truck driver he got to the point he could not hold down a job. He came home to see his property out on the street being gone through by all who passed by. This is when he lost it all. All his personal and irreplaceable stuff like photo’s and other memories. Now I know Wayne was not an angel and for much of his life he drank too much and made his share of mistakes, but when I met him he did not drink and tried to give good advice to those he met. He was depressed and lost in a world he was not familiar with for he had always worked and had a home and money. This being homeless and destitute was new to him. I helped him apply for food stamps, disability, and for housing because I had been forced to learn how myself. I have to admire Wayne for he has no hope for a cure with the MS and daily has to wake up to the pain, mental confusion, and physical weakness it causes, realizing it will not get better but will get worse till he dies from it. We will be with him for thanksgiving at his invitation. It is his way of thanking us for the help we offer. He has no income at all other than food stamps and that is barely enough to keep food on the table and does not provide for essentials like toilette paper or toothpaste yet he gives out of his need.
Fred is 87 years old and lives in our apartment complex. In fact he used to own it. His vision has deteriorated to the point he lost his license last year. I started driving him around and I take him to the store where I read the labels on food for him. He is the last of his family because his sister just died a few months ago. He does not seem to have many friends left at all because he has outlived most of them. When I asked him what he planned to do for thanksgiving he said he had nothing planned and will just stay home. His emphysema is so bad he cannot go out for long and not at all on some days. Still he does some good, he tries to help despite the hardness and sorrow that is inside. There was an old friend who had a brain tumor. As she lay dying he promised her he would care for her daughter who had suffered brain damage from a beating incurred during a robbery. This he continues to do despite mounting aggravation. Fred maintains a level of honor and integrity I must admire.
Barb is that daughter Fred promised to watch over. She exists day to day. While her traumatic brain injury is a major factor in her life there is a long list of problems she must live with. While I do not know all of them because I don’t get nosy she does not hide them. She has something called crones disease which is ugly and several others. She must take 14 different medications every day and it is beyond me how she can keep track of them. She lives in public housing which comes with it’s own set of problems. Much of my time spent for her is helping make sure she is not taken advantage of by the drug addicts and alcoholics that live there. Her social security checks and food stamps are doled out in small increments to reduce the chance of abuse. I know Barb has children but they seldom see her. Her brother sometimes comes by but it is usually to take advantage of her despite her circumstances. I help her for Fred by providing transportation and getting her to the grocery store, the doctors, and the churches that provide food and clothing. She will be having a thanksgiving dinner for 7 others who live in her complex who’s lives are also difficult. The most generous people I know are the poorest. It is a wonder for me to watch and understand that what I see today is the same heart Jesus saw 2000 years ago as I read in Luke 12:41-44. There Jesus sat by the treasury watching people come by and donate. It said that many who were rich put in much but a poor widow came by and put in 2 mites, which is like 2 pennies. Jesus said that this widow put in more than all the others because they gave out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty gave all she had, her whole livelihood.
So what do I have to be thankful for? My list grows daily. After waking from a coma and discovering I had been dead and was listed as a fatality in Oklahoma I am thankful for waking up each day. I am thankful that I have grown to not just understand but to truly have as an internal belief the lesson found in 1 Timothy 6:6-10 where it says that we have brought nothing into this world and it is certain we will carry nothing out. With food and clothing we should be content. Godliness with contentment are great gain. There are some who knew me when I owned multiple companies and earned a 6 figure income and so not understand why I am happy or how I can be content with clothes that are donated and wonder why I do not strive to regain my former status. My life is a gift and I am blessed to be able to give the gift of life to all who’s paths I cross. I am thankful for life and still being able to share it.